In New York, I constantly observe people out with each other being on their phones much of the time. It seems we're spending an inordinate amount of time posting about our lives on FB, or rather a version of our lives on Facebook, rather than being in an actual life. Even on festive occasions, we're more plugged in, than tuned in to those around us.
Read MoreSpirituality can be a loaded concept, depending on where you land, how you were brought up and what kind of images you have attached to. For instance, it can bring up notions of organized religion and belief systems, ideas of right and wrong, good or bad, or, at least in my world, ” enlightened or unenlightened”, awake or conscious, the question of who or what to follow (we all follow something, even if it’s an idea that speaks to us), and of course, whether to follow a leader or guru in any kind of spiritual school or personal-development method.
I am marking a new start in my life that I'd been reluctant to step into for different reasons, the most prominent being the feeling that I am "not quite there", not quite professional enough, not quite open-hearted enough, not quite smart enough, not quite [___] enough. I know we all have that "not quite enough-ness" part that speaks quietly but oh so insistently within us -- that voice that keeps us from knowing our gifts and stymies our ability to take in our greatness.
Read MoreThis picture was taken of me almost year and a half ago just outside of Berlin. I shared it once with the incredible women in my Erotic Goddess Community last November when I was mired deeply in self-recrimination. I had just finished chemo about two to three weeks prior. So this scene was the first of many vulnerable steps I was about to take, knowing very little what I was stepping into.
Read MoreA good friend of mine recently wrote a social media post about saying the words “I love you” and how difficult it was for him at times to share that sentence. Thinking back, I realized that I have rarely, if ever, heard those words said out loud.
In my family, it was understood or assumed that you were loved—but those words were almost never spoken. The way love was communicated growing up was through teasing—slightly sarcastic, mildly insulting quips. Saying “I love you” directly was somehow not part of my family’s communication.
I found out on February 9th, 2014...
Just the day before, I had facilitated a workshop delving into the feminine with sixteen delicious, eclectic and fierce women. It was called "Come As You Are", and during that play date, we danced, laughed, cried, fought and loved in a room full of heart, sex, desire, pain and a deep sense of sisterhood.
I've made a career of working with women in all kinds of settings and for many different reasons, mostly around helping them find their depth, deliciousness and desirability through reclaiming their sexuality.
Read MoreUsually when we say "intimacy", we think of sex. But without a deeper understanding of what intimacy truly means, connection — with others, but most importantly, with ourselves — is lost. And without a conscious, embodied experience of self-and other-intimacy, sexuality and sensuality can feel at times, dissatisfying and disconnected. Schools of body psychology, spirituality and energy consistently teach that sexuality and life force — our joy, our vitality, our success, our engagement with life, — are intricately linked.
Read MoreLast year saw the shocking loss of so many musicians that were the sound track of my early life: David Bowie, Prince, Leonard Cohen, George Michael, Leon Russell, Glenn Frye and Keith Emerson. I also need to mention Carrie Fisher and her mother, Debbie Reynolds; their death was the stunning culmination to the year 2016, which I am dubbing “the year the music died”.
This prompted my year-in-review, as the losses brought home to me how much we live in the unknown. It made me aware of how fast time moves and how quickly things change.
For me personally, it was a year of openings, possibilities and tremendous movement. It was also the year of watching structures I thought were impermeable, crumble.
Read MoreA few weeks ago, on a Saturday morning I woke up out of a dead sleep with an incredible urgency to tell the people I cared about in my life that I loved them. You might have seen the post on Facebook with the new version of Where Is the Love. I called, emailed and messaged as many of my people as was humanly possible in the span of fifteen minutes. (I had to get to a workshop I was attending).
I thought that once I reached out the urgency would become less intense. In fact, as the day, weekend and week passed, it became stronger by the minute. I just couldn't shake the feeling that if I didn't tell someone at least once a day that I loved them, I was going to miss an opportunity or it was going to be too late.
Watch the YouTube video here. After watching the video, I am still in the inquiry of love. In my last newsletter and a subsequent Facebook live ramble (that lasted maybe a bit too long 😳 ), I've been on a quest to find what love actually is/feels like. My last newsletter asked the questions how do we know that what we are feeling is love and is it easier to give than receive? In the video above, the Rabbi talks about love and gives a great analogy about fish love.
A couple of things struck me as I watched. He says, "everyone loves themselves" as if it is a given, when, in fact, I find many people struggle with this.
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